I honestly I have no real idea of what it is like to be a young woman in India. My only glimpse of a young woman's life is through my conversations with our babysitter. She is a sweet 21-year old university student. I'm so lucky to have her live near us and to be available most anytime I need her (and if she's not she'll send her sister). She and I will sit and talk sometimes if Arthur is sleeping or Dorian is otherwise occupied when she arrives or sometimes we all sit and play together for a while. Other than babysitting, she's helped me put on my sari, made soup when we were sick and massaged my legs when I thought I had dengue and they were aching (I did not ask her to do this, she offered and while I felt a bit uncomfortable about it she said she does it for her family when they are not well).
She has told me about her classes at school. She has mentioned that she and a boy she knows from school wanted to marry but his family would not allow it because she is from a different caste. She said she wants to cut her hair but her father will not let her. He said she must wait until she marries then she can ask her husband. Her life is so different from my upbringing. Not only did I have so much freedom, my parents told me I could do anything I put my mind to (not necessarily referring to my hair, but more about my future). I really enjoy chatting with her. It's made me realize that we come from two separate worlds and I wish I could give her a little of mine.
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the fact is people from different socio-economic backgrounds in India would feel differently. I can see a lot of Indians talking like you would too...I don't know if there could ever be a single way in which young women live in India...everything is so diverse, and people are so different ...I feel geographic background would probably be less important than the family background...
ReplyDeleteI am also an Indian girl brought up in a typical middle class scenario, though I think from a different community from her. I feel as strange about her restricted lifestyle as you do - it's totally opposite from the way I was brought up. But, I think it may be because I come from a regional community which has no hangups about the status of woman. So, there is no one way of looking at a life of a "young woman" in india - as is true for any other country.
ReplyDeleteYou know what's funny ... there are some parts of what is likely "her world" that I too wish I could have ... would gladly cast off some of my western upbringing for some of what I see here!
ReplyDeleteI know where you're coming from though!!
Thanks so much for your comments. I know there is no one way of looking at young women in India, just as I am not representative of all women from the U.S. And, I agree that family often shapes us more than external factors. I'm just so interested to learn more and touched that she shares her thoughts with me.
ReplyDeleteCaitlin, I love reading your blog. Makes me miss you.
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